Blog Number 2

I've been thinking a lot lately about mortality. My great grandfather died at the age of 37, my grandfather at the age of 40. My dad died when he was 67, a little over 12 years ago. I am 51, and have not really taken the best care of myself over the years. So if you figure 68, looks like I'm headed into the fourth quarter now. As people have said for years, so little time, and so much to do.

I have wasted so much time over the years. Poor living habits, carrying grudges, being angry. I could have used my time so much more wisely. I had opportunities to do things I never did. I was lazy--I would take the easy way. I wasted a chance at a good college education--twice. I have let friendships slip away, had people I care about leave my life, failed to say goodbye to dying loved ones...

And yet I still find myself a lucky guy. I am fortunate to have a wonderful family. Two wonderful children getting great college educations. Married to a wonderful woman who has put up with me for 26+ years and continues to do so. I have a job that I "settled" for almost 23 years ago--it was just temporary, which has enabled me to live a rather comfortable life. My kids will graduate without debt. I will have retirement!

But I have things I need to do. I'm trying to be a better person. I try not to let the things I have little or no control over not bother me. It's hard. I worry about my children and their future. I hope they are able to live comfortably, at least as comfortable as I have. But the world is changing--and I don't think always for the better. They will have many challenges I fear.

So what am I going to do? Try and take better care of myself. Try to "unclutter" my life, so others don't have to do it when I'm gone. Try and help out others where I can. Try not to waste so much time--you only get so much. Encourage my children to get involved, to get in the fire....Live your life, don't simply survive it. Love and support my wife--she has earned and deserves that. And just try and be happy because we only here for a short while....